I have put a lot of effort into planning my art pieces for the semester, like really thinking about and sketching the ideas. I am trying to make things non arbitrary, but meaningful, well planned, but spontaneous. It's a hard balance to find, but I'm trying really hard. I just finished printing the first edition of my first project yesterday. I may have to redo it and make a second edition that's a little different, but I am still trying my best to get it down. I am working on sketches for my next project right now, and I'm super excited about it.
I am missing Brazil a lot lately. I have met a few more Brazilians this semester, and they just make me miss it more and more. I feel like it's just slowly slipping away from me, and I'm scared to lose it. I guess that's why I am going to portray one of my favorite places in Brazil for my next piece. I miss a beautiful cobblestone street that brought the feeling of classic romance alive, especially at night in the lantern-lit street. While I wasn't really thinking about romance while I was in Brazil, I would give almost anything to go back there and see that street again. I would give anything to walk down it with that special someone and share with them the beauty that I fell in love with. That's why I am bringing it to me through my artwork since I can't go to it right now. I will have to start putting pictures of my work up through the processes so that it seems that I am actually doing something.
I guess if anyone wants, here's my design work on Behance. That way, you know that I'm not lying about studying design and art. I know that I've been super bad about really showing it, but I am so excited to be slowly finding my way of expression. That's something I have always struggled with. I have always had kind of a hard time expressing how I feel, which makes it nice to have another way to try and really express myself. It's hard for me to verbally open up to people, but in the past I have had music to do that. I could say things through the piano that even I didn't understand about myself, and I'm just starting on my journey to get there in the visual arts. I have found that through the arts, we are subtly more honest about ourselves than we would otherwise be without even realizing it. Artwork is the purest form of a self-portrait. We let so much about ourselves out without even realizing it.
I think that's why art is so therapeutic. People sing to let people know that they are excited, in love, or something like that. It shows how they feel about the world around them, and about themselves. What's more honest than that? The best part is that we don't even realize it while it is happening. I guess that's why I like the arts so much. I can let out problems that I don't even want to admit that I have. I can embrace a side of me that I normally don't even acknowledge. To me, that is the hardest thing about life. It's about accepting our imperfections. It's about realizing that no one is perfect, no matter what it seems like. It's about accepting that we aren't the only ones with problems.
It's just so hard. People may come and go in our lives, but we don't know how this is going to affect us. We never know how, years later, we may look back on something seemingly trivial just to see mow big of a difference it really made in our lives. I wish I could tell every person that made a difference in my life how much they mean to me. I wish I could tell everyone how much I love them and help them to see that I really mean it. I wish I could go back in time and just pause during the moments of pure bliss. That way, I could really appreciate them like I didn't in the moment. But, let's be real. I can't do that. Life doesn't really allow it. So take your days as they come. Love the good and the bad, and never give up. Your future can be even brighter than your past if you let it. Nothing is final because there is always tomorrow. Experience eternity today. It's the best place to start.
