Anyway, I have done a lot of thinking this week. Granted, I had less time for thinking this week than I had last week because I started working 40 hours again and going to class for 6 hours a week, but it's okay. I think the mental stimulus from working and going to class actually helped me to think better. Having less time to just think made me think more objectively about things. That is one of the keys to doing things in the art world: necessity creates the environment to come up with ideas better than an overly relaxed situation.
It has been good for me to start working. Too much free time kind of kills you after a while. Relaxation is only good for so long. Being mentally dead because you don't have productive stimulus gets pretty tiresome after a while. As I went back to class and work, I had a neat opportunity come up to think, and to think deeply. For the class I'm taking (advanced printmaking) I had to come up with project proposals for three projects, and then we created a theme for the fourth project together as a class. Since we just did that on Wednesday, I am now trying to come up with my idea for that project. We are going to be basing our project on our own personal vulnerabilities. We are going to delve deep into ourselves, to find our biggest insecurity, our deepest fear about ourselves, and then we have to confront it. I am so excited to do this. I think this project will end up being the most honest "self portrait" of sorts that any artist can do. Not that it is a real self portrait, but I think it will show a lot more than an actual self portrait will about ourselves. Nothing comes closer than the truth than what we are afraid to let out. The cool thing about this project is that upon choosing our subject matter, we can decide if we want to embrace or try to overcome this imperfection. I personally would agree with Andy Warhol's outlook on imperfections. He believed that they are what make us beautiful. Our idiosyncrasies make us who we are for better or for worse. Sometimes, the best thing we can do is embrace it. Just because we don't like it doesn't necessarily mean that it's all bad. I mean, this is one of my favorite scriptures from the Book of Mormon, and it illustrates that perfectly:
And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:27)
Honestly, so many of us refuse to acknowledge our "ugly side" because it seems like everyone else is so perfect. They aren't, so why should we have to be. That doesn't mean that we can't or shouldn't try to come closer to perfection, but we shouldn't kill ourselves over it. Here's a super good article about this mentality if you are looking for extra reading. But honestly, can you imagine if we were all "perfect" we would then all be the same, and life isn't fun without variation.
Anyway, life is good, and I get the chance to look at it up close and personal this semester. I feel that there is no greater privilege than to look life straight in the eye and learn from it. Embrace it, the good and the bad. Love the silly string fights and Polaroids. Love the silly memories with friends as well as the ones that might make you cry. Love it all no matter how hard. Loving involves accepting the good and the bad. That's what life is about. It's about changing our perspective and widening our horizons.
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